Check out Monica Ensign from ImPerfect Pearls‘ take on positive body image.
“I look bad in shorts, most of us do, I don’t let that bother me.” – Mother Love Bone
Me too! Well, I don’t look bad in shorts but I look bad braless in a tube top. I don’t let that bother me. We’ve all got a thing or two about our bodies that we don’t love, the trick is to keep on rockin’. Regardless!
To be happy you need to start accepting yourself. I mean the lot of it! The whole of YOU. Not just the stuff you like but even the stuff you don’t. Especially the stuff you don’t. It’s making peace with your less fortunate attributes and characteristics instead of being mortified by them. Focus on your strengths. Improve upon them.
Try something new – guitar lessons, martial arts, improv… whatever. Just do something you’ve never done before. To feel out of your element is all sorts of brilliant and it will take you to places you’ve never been before. The very point of this adventure!
“Confidence is a decision. You will never earn it. It will come when you decide to have it.” – Charlotte Wood
Confidence can’t be built with plastic. As in artifice. It comes from knowing who you are and accepting yourself. That means both bodily and personality flaws.
I have been asked often over the years if I would have cosmetic surgery to change this or that and my answer has always been an honest ‘No’. I say that without judgement of the practice or of the people who have opted in. When I’m asked why, I can describe it best with this story: Awhile back I bit into a whole food bar that had a walnut shell mixed in it (whole food, indeed!) and it broke my tooth into pieces. A week later the temporary crown I was given came off and my kids said, “Oh no fair! Now the tooth fairy’s gonna come visit YOU!”
I was retelling the story to the dental assistant as she was adhering it back to my tooth and she laughed and said, “Nope, it doesn’t count because it’s fake.”
I stopped a moment, smiled and said, “Exactly.”
That’s the entire reason why I couldn’t go through with a procedure just for the sake of looks alone. For me, it would feel like I had cheated.
Over the years I have realized that I am almost entirely alone in that viewpoint! *picture me laughing here* That’s okay though, I don’t have these conversations to make people share my opinions, just to have them better understand their own. Because what I have found in 13 years of research is that most people haven’t put any real thought into why they are dissatisfied with their bodies.
They’ve just been told that they should be.
Although we are born knowing how to be secure with ourselves, we lose track of the wisdom somewhere along the way. This leaves us vulnerable to the opinions of others. If you are feeling insecure, simply watching TV and movies can further your feelings of inadequacy. We compare ourselves to the actors. And now everyday people on the street. Who pattern themselves after the actors who, for the sake of their professions, are nipped, tucked and implanted. “Perfection” sells.
We assume that the grass is greener under the shade of larger breasts.
I have known many people who have undergone different cosmetic procedures – some just one thing, others many more. But in the final equation there is a sense of unease regarding their “improved” body part. On some level they calculate the disengenuineness and it doesn’t sit entirely well with them. Most women I know who have had procedures surround themselves with others who have as well. It’s a safer mirror in which to gauge one’s own reflection.
Let’s not drink the Kool Aid the media and beauty industry is selling us, shall we?
Wanting what we don’t have is fairly common, as is thinking you’ll be happy once you get it. Entirely normal, completely untrue.
Don’t believe the hype.
You will only be happy when you decide to be happy. Right now, where you are, with what you’ve got.
Step away from the mirror. Back off of the visuals.
You Hold The Key.